Search found 16 matches

by CierraJo
Mon Oct 22, 2012 7:54 pm
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: Is anyone else completely sex-aversive?
Replies: 31
Views: 9217

Re: Is anyone else completely sex-aversive?

I have a very strong aversion to sex. In theory it shouldn't be a problem because, being married to another asexual, I'm not ever expected to have sex. But I'm horrified by the idea of it, I have intrusive thoughts about it, and I'm extremely uncomfortable with sex on TV or in movies or whatever. (...
by CierraJo
Sat Jun 28, 2008 7:36 pm
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: Painful Sex (Warning: frank talk about female parts ahead!)
Replies: 4
Views: 1786

Re: Painful Sex (Warning: frank talk about female parts ahead!)

Thanks for post this CierraJo; its always helpful to have new knowledge. I had heard of vestibulitis before but don't know what it is. Never heard of Levator Ani Syndrome at all. And I was an avid reader of mags like Cosmopolitan for years and have read a lot about health issues. Would you mind exp...
by CierraJo
Tue Jun 17, 2008 10:14 am
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: Painful Sex (Warning: frank talk about female parts ahead!)
Replies: 4
Views: 1786

Painful Sex (Warning: frank talk about female parts ahead!)

I haven't been on here in a while, but in the last 6 weeks or so I have learned some valuable information that I think may be helpful to some people on here, so i decided to just share it. I wasn't sure which Topic to put this under, but I chose "sexuality" because it may be explicit and t...
by CierraJo
Mon Apr 28, 2008 4:17 pm
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: Negativity, reactionary responses, etc.
Replies: 13
Views: 3234

Re: Negativity, reactionary responses, etc.

CierraJo, while you may still be antisexual, you are NOT one of those antisexuals. I haven't seen much of what you have posted at AVEN, but I have read your posts here, and unlike those antisexuals, you listen, learn, and try to understand. If all antisexuals tried to understand even half as much a...
by CierraJo
Mon Apr 28, 2008 2:43 pm
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: Negativity, reactionary responses, etc.
Replies: 13
Views: 3234

Re: Negativity, reactionary responses, etc.

Not at all - which is why I explicitly posted to that effect on the AVEN thread. It's clear you speak from your experiences, not irrationality, unlike some I could name, but won't. I also stand by my comments in that thread that I didn't take anything personally, because frankly 0% of my sense of p...
by CierraJo
Mon Apr 28, 2008 6:53 am
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: Negativity, reactionary responses, etc.
Replies: 13
Views: 3234

Re: Negativity, reactionary responses, etc.

Every -ism has its fundamentalists, and the antisexuals are asexuality's: Ignorant, irrational, dogmatic, hypersensitive to criticism, intolerant of disagreement, sure that they're blessed as the purest of them all. Olivier - I hope you don't consider me to be those things, though I do consider mys...
by CierraJo
Tue Apr 15, 2008 4:05 am
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: [Adult] Compromise in sexual/asexual relationships: ideas?
Replies: 51
Views: 26739

Re: [Adult] Compromise in sexual/asexual relationships: ideas?

I just found this site through a link on an Aven thread by Olivier and since I am trying to find "compromise" in my marriage I had to come read. I am asexy, DH is sexual. After reading through these posts I could have written what CierraJo has expressed almost to a "T". I have f...
by CierraJo
Sun Apr 13, 2008 6:07 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Dear Apositive: i am in love with an asexual guy
Replies: 4
Views: 3771

Re: Dear Apositive: i am in love with an asexual guy

I suppose it depends how close the two of you actually are. But if you are close enough to be comfortable with saying "I know you are asexual, but I am interested in a relationship with you that doesn't have to become sexual." Also, I think it's obvious that asexuals vary greatly on how th...
by CierraJo
Thu Apr 10, 2008 11:55 am
Forum: General Discussions and Fun
Topic: Who are you?
Replies: 94
Views: 20437

Re: Who are you?

I ahve the same name on AVEN as here, although I am new to both communities & haven't posted on AVEN yet. I'm punkyb13 on the Asexuality LJ.
by CierraJo
Mon Mar 31, 2008 1:03 pm
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: [Adult] Compromise in sexual/asexual relationships: ideas?
Replies: 51
Views: 26739

Re: [Adult] Compromise in sexual/asexual relationships: ideas?

Olivier - I have read everything you wrote to me several times. Thank you for helping. In particular, thanks for the oxytocin info...I had never heard of that before. I think it's clear that I have very low levels of that, or none at all. But doing some research on that has been helpful to me & ...
by CierraJo
Sat Mar 29, 2008 5:35 pm
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: Legitimacy and Blurry Lines
Replies: 34
Views: 26524

Re: Is Asexuality Legitimate?

I am one of the people that this post is directed at - since I have sexual trauma in my past. For a long time I thought that was what caused my problems with sex, but after doing a bunch of research and trying to get "better" I realized that there was a big difference between myself and th...
by CierraJo
Thu Mar 27, 2008 1:21 pm
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: [Adult] Compromise in sexual/asexual relationships: ideas?
Replies: 51
Views: 26739

Re: [Adult] Compromise in sexual/asexual relationships: ideas?

I In my experience the very worst thing about replacing sex with solitary masturbation is not the nature of the orgasm (although that's a small part of it), it's losing the feeling of connection with my partner, so if you can keep that connection and involvement, then it's not so bad. Thanks. I can...
by CierraJo
Thu Mar 27, 2008 4:14 am
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: [Adult] Compromise in sexual/asexual relationships: ideas?
Replies: 51
Views: 26739

Re: [Adult] Compromise in sexual/asexual relationships: ideas?

are you sure he's worth it? It doesn't sound like he cares for you enough. The thing is, when sex is not involved, he is the sweetest most caring guy EVER...he cares about me more than anyone I know. But he's like a different person when it comes to sex. He says he is less aggressive with me than h...
by CierraJo
Wed Mar 26, 2008 6:01 pm
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: [Adult] Compromise in sexual/asexual relationships: ideas?
Replies: 51
Views: 26739

Re: [Adult] Compromise in sexual/asexual relationships: ideas?

Olivier - Thanks for some suggestions & advice. It seems though, that you may be a more umm...personal sexual than my boyfriend. We have both had a LOT of partners so it is difficult for me to think that he really has any sex-love connection in his brain, even though he claims he does. But when ...
by CierraJo
Wed Mar 26, 2008 5:31 pm
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: Reasons other than sexual attraction that people have sex
Replies: 16
Views: 32237

Re: Reasons other than sexual attraction that people have sex

This list is great. I am gonna print it out & see which reasons my sexual b/f identifies with & show him the ones I identify with...maybe that would help us understand each other better!!!!
by CierraJo
Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:19 pm
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: [Adult] Compromise in sexual/asexual relationships: ideas?
Replies: 51
Views: 26739

Re: [Adult] Compromise in sexual/asexual relationships: ideas?

I know I am coming in late to this convo - but if anyone is still interested in talking about this topic, here goes!!!! It is interesting to me that so many asexuals are willing to and even interested in participating in sexual activity. I am new to this community so I am just learning, but I am in ...