Search found 30 matches

by Mage
25 Jan 2011, 17:07
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Poly
Replies: 50
Views: 21247

Re: Poly

I do identify as a polyamorous asexual. You can read some of my opinions on polyamory here: http://acefeminisms.blogspot.com/2010/10/friendship-as-polyamory.html I began to identify as polyamorous when I was 12 or 13 years old. I had a primary relationship with someone who was far older than I was, ...
by Mage
24 Jan 2011, 01:16
Forum: Relationships
Topic: The concept of squish
Replies: 45
Views: 24580

Re: The concept of squish

I didn't get to see the troll either. :( lol Dargon, you're welcome for (to?) the term limerence! It's a word that I found useful a long time before I even became aware of asexuality, because I was trying to understand why I was both attracted to people and repulsed by them at the same time. It's st...
by Mage
24 Jan 2011, 01:05
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Is asexuality intrinsically unromantic to sexuals?
Replies: 14
Views: 8572

Re: Is asexuality intrinsically unromantic to sexuals?

When I first started sharing my zines (about asexuality) and talking to people in my life about asexuality, a surprising number of sexual people revealed that were completely turned-on (sexually and otherwise) by my asexuality. Perhaps it wasn't so much the asexuality that turned them on as much as ...
by Mage
07 Dec 2010, 08:28
Forum: Relationships
Topic: The concept of squish
Replies: 45
Views: 24580

Re: The concept of squish

This thread may be over a year old now, but it's fascinating to me. I'm always late to the party. First, to address the concept of squish. To me it sounds like a juvenille slang term for limerence ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerence ), which romantic asexuals experience and describe as a crush ...
by Mage
06 Dec 2010, 18:47
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: Asexuals who LOOOOOVE teh sex
Replies: 14
Views: 5780

Re: Asexuals who LOOOOOVE teh sex

These responses are all very interesting, and I'm glad that people are willing to respond to some of the questions without resorting to an anonymous survey. I know privacy can be a serious concern and I don't want anyone to feel awkward or pressured. I find that I can relate to some of the responses...
by Mage
03 Dec 2010, 09:38
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: Asexuals who LOOOOOVE teh sex
Replies: 14
Views: 5780

Re: Asexuals who LOOOOOVE teh sex

Thanks for responding, Siggy. You make a good point about privacy, and I was about to make a post suggesting that perhaps it would be better if I made an anonymous survey and put it on my blog for some of these questions. So I think that'll be the next step, happening probably either tonight or tomo...
by Mage
03 Dec 2010, 07:19
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: Asexuals who LOOOOOVE teh sex
Replies: 14
Views: 5780

Asexuals who LOOOOOVE teh sex

I feel like a n00b every time I post, since I've discovered that I can't possibly go through every single post ever made by an asexual anywhere (but feel like I should have done so!). So I'm sorry if this has been discussed elsewhere in detail. Since there have been a number of blog posts recently a...
by Mage
30 Nov 2010, 07:53
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: Asexuality, and Love
Replies: 10
Views: 5131

Re: Asexuality, and Love

I have also read many of Helen Fisher's writings. I took a course called Science of Women's Bodies which was based in large part on her texts, and at the end of the term I gave a mini lecture on asexuality and love (just to spite the text :halo:). I agree that what is being described is pair-bonding...
by Mage
13 Oct 2010, 16:36
Forum: Relationships
Topic: In-love with a self-described hypersexual.
Replies: 10
Views: 5764

Re: In-love with a self-described hypersexual.

Siggy, your point about feeling like I have to conform to a certain image is perfect and that's definitely something I'm going to bring up. The point you made also brought to mind Ily's recent blog entry about coming out, and whether we should tack on something like what the appropriate response is ...
by Mage
10 Oct 2010, 15:59
Forum: Relationships
Topic: In-love with a self-described hypersexual.
Replies: 10
Views: 5764

Re: In-love with a self-described hypersexual.

Debiguity, I think you're right about sexual behavior /= attraction. The problem is convincing other people that this is true, but I'm working on it. Hopefully directing people to my blog (including him) will help with this because I talk about that issue. It definitely applies to people of other or...
by Mage
10 Oct 2010, 07:33
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: Demisexual to Asexual (fluid sexuality)
Replies: 2
Views: 1781

Re: Demisexual to Asexual (fluid sexuality)

Hm, yeah I think sexual attraction is probably far more complicated than just hormones. I'm certainly not an expert, though. Also, I'm confused. Are you saying that you used to be demi and now you're totally asexual? I'm curious about what made you decide to change how you identify. I recently chang...
by Mage
10 Oct 2010, 01:15
Forum: Relationships
Topic: In-love with a self-described hypersexual.
Replies: 10
Views: 5764

Re: In-love with a self-described hypersexual.

Ily, you're right. I shouldn't expect him to know what to ask me. I feel like it couldn't be more clear that "does not experience sexual attraction," only means that and is not a reflection of my attitudes toward sex, but I suppose if one has always experienced sexual attraction towards th...
by Mage
09 Oct 2010, 17:59
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: Why are sexual thoughts called 'dirty'?
Replies: 12
Views: 5718

Re: Why are sexual thoughts called 'dirty'?

Even strict atheists will call sex dirty, in my experience. It's become a cultural norm to say thing like, "doing the dirty," or being "naughty," even among sex positive people. Um, I kind of understand how the associations were originally made, but I dunno why people won't just ...
by Mage
09 Oct 2010, 16:16
Forum: Relationships
Topic: In-love with a self-described hypersexual.
Replies: 10
Views: 5764

In-love with a self-described hypersexual.

Well, I don't know where else to turn because I don't have any asexual friends offline. My nonasexual friends are sympathetic, but I think they're getting annoyed at hearing me talk about this issue. Basically, about five months ago I fell in-love with a person who is a self-described hypersexual. O...
by Mage
09 Oct 2010, 15:42
Forum: Community & Public Visibility
Topic: Asexual Zine! - Call for submission
Replies: 21
Views: 7964

Re: Asexual Zine! - Call for submission

Hey! I haven't been on Apositive in awhile. I wish I had seen this earlier. I knew you were putting a zine together, but for some reason I lost track of time. I'd love to have a digital copy of your zine, or pick it up somewhere if it is being distributed in Portland. Do you have any plans to put ou...
by Mage
02 Jul 2010, 13:35
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: Why do we organize as asexuals?
Replies: 33
Views: 13669

Re: Why do we organize as asexuals?

I'm not saying that I think all science is completely flawed, but I think a lot of research is directed by politics, as well as cultural concepts, especially where sexuality is the subject of study. Sexuality, I believe, is not something that can be fully grasped through scientific study because the...
by Mage
02 Jul 2010, 09:41
Forum: Introductions
Topic: Hey all
Replies: 6
Views: 1073

Re: Hey all

Yes! I love reading. Sometimes it's overwhelming to do so much theorizing, with this forum and school combined, so I think I'll have to visit in small doses. Still, I appreciate the discussions going on here. Also I agree about how exhausting it can be to share a forum with adolescents. I mean, good...
by Mage
02 Jul 2010, 09:30
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: Are these things sexual or asexual?
Replies: 13
Views: 6973

Re: Are these things sexual or asexual?

Do you think that, by the strictest definitions, one could say that pansexuality is the opposite of asexuality? So by the strictest definitions I mean: asexual: one who does not experience sexual attraction pansexual: one who experiences sexual attraction to people of all genders and sexes I was thi...
by Mage
01 Jul 2010, 15:49
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: Oppression and asexuality
Replies: 13
Views: 8455

Re: Oppression and asexuality

Thanks for telling me about the most current issue, pretzelboy. I thought it was odd that the issue on the front page of AVEN was so old! By the way, are you at all interested in putting out another issue any time soon? As I said before, I think we are oppressed as a group systemically through educa...
by Mage
01 Jul 2010, 13:58
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: Pre-asexuality views on sex?
Replies: 38
Views: 20534

Re: Pre-asexuality views on sex?

I was super confused before realizing my orientation. I felt like I had to prove to myself that I was a sexual person, in part because I thought sex jokes were hilarious. I identified as bisexual from puberty until I was 20, and then I identified as a lesbian because I understood that I almost never...
by Mage
01 Jul 2010, 13:09
Forum: Sexuality
Topic: Sexual repression?
Replies: 53
Views: 24584

Re: Sexual repression?

Not to totally spam, I just wanted to say that this thread is great! Any time someone writes about how silly Freud is I cheer inside. Also there is a lot of great info in here. Ignoring the troll, totally share-worthy.
by Mage
01 Jul 2010, 12:48
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: Why do we organize as asexuals?
Replies: 33
Views: 13669

Re: Why do we organize as asexuals?

What I'm trying to get at is that I don't think there is a scientific reason for any sexuality to exist, so while science can be used to prove that asexual identified people are not ill, it's not going to do anything to prove why we're asexual and I seriously hope it won't move in that direction. Sc...
by Mage
01 Jul 2010, 12:37
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: On Demisexuality
Replies: 33
Views: 14951

Re: On Demisexuality

The axes confuse me too! What appeals to me is the varying levels of attraction, that multiple genders as well as non-humans are included, and the recognition of multiple types of attraction. Grrrrr...I just really want to have a model that is understandable so I can workshop it! I want to boggle th...
by Mage
01 Jul 2010, 12:20
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: Oppression and asexuality
Replies: 13
Views: 8455

Re: Oppression and asexuality

I'm not sure if asexuals would be considered oppressed as a group, considering how few people even know we're a group. As a group, we are invisible, which brings its own issues. Just because something might not be "oppression" per se doesn't mean that everything is all fine and dandy. The...
by Mage
30 Jun 2010, 14:40
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: Oppression and asexuality
Replies: 13
Views: 8455

Oppression and asexuality

I haven't been able to find a topic specifically about oppression on Apostive, so I'm making one. Lately I've been thinking a lot about what oppression is and whether asexuals experience oppression around this orientation specifically. Multiple people have told me that in order to be oppressed, you ...
by Mage
30 Jun 2010, 14:17
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: Why do we organize as asexuals?
Replies: 33
Views: 13669

Re: Why do we organize as asexuals?

You want to organize for the sake of science? Seriously? The only reason I can think of to scientifically study ANY queer sexuality is to make people heterosexual. I think we should organize to prevent scientific research from being done on us. In fact, since I can't find anything through the search...
by Mage
30 Jun 2010, 09:12
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: On Demisexuality
Replies: 33
Views: 14951

Re: On Demisexuality

Personally, I have yet to see anyone claim to be demisexual in order to validate their need to be "special" or to prove to their romantic partners that their relationship is unique. However, I have been openly describing myself as demisexual for a few months now (wasn't so open before, and...
by Mage
30 Jun 2010, 07:39
Forum: Introductions
Topic: Hey all
Replies: 6
Views: 1073

Re: Hey all

Awesome! The zine is still in the works because it is collaborative. It'll be out around the end of July...When it is I'll absolutely trade with you! Yesssss
by Mage
29 Jun 2010, 15:11
Forum: Asexuality
Topic: "I hate being asexual and want to change"
Replies: 29
Views: 15879

Re: "I hate being asexual and want to change"

It's interesting to me that some asexuals feel this kind of self-hatred. It reminds me of the not-uncommon problem that many depressed/unhappy people of other minority groups or "non-normative" groups experience--wanting to belong to the dominant group. The more cultural invisibility a per...
by Mage
29 Jun 2010, 14:47
Forum: Introductions
Topic: Hey all
Replies: 6
Views: 1073

Hey all

Hey everyone, Like many people here, I started out at AVEN. I'm still visiting and reading whenever something novel comes up, but I feel like I need more than I'm getting there. I read somewhere (not pointing fingers) that Apositive is more intellectually challenging, which is exactly what I need! I...

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