How to tell parents if your a young asexual

For discussion of general issues pertaining to asexuality.
PiF
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How to tell parents if your a young asexual

Postby PiF » Mon Jul 06, 2015 11:21 am

Anddddd breathe anddddd count to ten

First bit first as they say .... as a parent..I can absolutely assure you...the worse thing a child can say to their parents.... ISN'T..Mum/Dad, would it be okay if I wasn't sexually attracted to anyone?

There are plenty of things that will piss them off but for most..saying sex isn't high on your radar isn't one of them...fear of telling them is greater than the act itself...for most it will be a huge weight off your shoulders when you do..if you feel you need to

Be realistic 1...there is a good reason why over 75% of those claiming some form of asexuality are mostly in the discovery years...some may hate the term "phase" but it is a phase..you are experiencing it, your parents did, and your parents parents did...we all do....it is a time that you go from child to start your life as a young adult..it is a phase of discovery..most of you claiming some form of asexuality..will not be doing so in 10 maybe even 5 years....that does not mean at this mommment...right now...how you feel is not important..it is important..but it leads into

Be realistic 2..if you are the type of person who latches onto something within minutes of hearing something... then a few weeks later you identify as something else.... then a few weeks later something else etc..you cannot blame your family, loved ones, friends for not being sure at what point they should agree with you... which leads too

Be realistic 3....if you have been looking, researching your discovery phase for days, weeks, months even years...do not expect your loved ones to "get it" within seconds of you telling them..you didn't discover it in seconds, why would you expect them to get it in seconds..which leads too

Be realistic 4...You have no right to demand "every one gets it"...the best you can do, is explain your case, what you feel it is, how it fits in with you, how you feel your life works with it...you may even accept it maybe part of your discovery phase but again point out discovery phase or not..at this momment it is incredibly important to you.....explain that....hope more people get it than do not...and do not be angry about those who do not understand, it doesn't mean they do not love you...which leads onto the last

Be realistic 5...as I said..it is more likely that most will not be claiming to be asexual in 5 years ....so do not cut off bridges based on the temper of youth...your book of life has many sentences within many paragraphs within many chapters of which youth is just one very very small part...Quicker than you think, you will be looked on as old by the new generation of youngsters younger than you...but all through life's troubles and tribulations....strong friendships and strong family ties can help you through

Beyond these 5 realistic rules...life is a crap shoot..but you have more control over it's direction than you think.

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KAGU143
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Re: How to tell parents if your a young asexual

Postby KAGU143 » Tue Jul 07, 2015 6:33 am

One thing I would add:

If you get the old standby response of "You just haven't found the right person yet," then you should totally agree with your parents and reassure them that it's very likely true.
There is no need to confuse them by saying that the "right" person for you will probably be another asexual and that the search may take quite a while because asexuals are extremely rare.
If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.