Working on an Article for a Magazine

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gypsygrrl420
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Working on an Article for a Magazine

Postby gypsygrrl420 » Fri Feb 23, 2018 2:16 am

Hi guys!

I'm working on an article about asexuality for a magazine right now, and I am completely stuck. I'm focusing on educating readers on what asexuality actually is (this magazine focuses on sexual health -- in fact, its called exactly that, lol) and some of the struggles those of us on the spectrum experience in discussing our orientation with the general public. (As I stated when I introduced myself, I work in the adult retail industry. Basically, I work in a high end sex shop. So the topic of my orientation comes up, frequently.)

If anyone cares to share any anecdotes about sharing their orientation with others, and reactions to their coming out, I will be more than happy to try working them into my article (no real names necessary, of course.)

Thanks!

Rai

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CatBunny
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Re: Working on an Article for a Magazine

Postby CatBunny » Tue Mar 06, 2018 7:25 pm

I tend to tell people I know very, very well. Once it got out to someone I didn't know and I basically tried never discussing it again... Its always the same replies "do you have a fetish then? It must be nice not marrying/having sex/dating/having a sex drive? (even though I'm completely capable of that haha) Oh I relate, I hate relationships! etc. etc." I used to be more liberal with what I said but I realized It just feels weird, not only repeating yourself but also making yourself look like you're obsessed with one trait when there's more to myself (my mom especially poking fun at me over it and she is right in that aspect. I got more things to talk about besides being ace).

Then when it gets to the sex part its even worse, because you know once you say you have an active sex drive but asexual they want to know every detailed bit of your sexual proclivities to educate themselves. Like sure you can go "its okay, i'm ACE! I'M ASEXUAL! I'VE NEVER BEEN ATTRACTED TO ANYONE! I'M A VIRGIN! HAHAHA!" but in the end you just mentioned personal sex stuff to someone you usually wouldn't but somehow being asexual makes it feel less embarrassing, like when gay guys grab womans breasts and try to laugh it off "don't worry! I'm gay!" (basically what i'm saying its extremely embarrassing and creepy when you think too hard about it).

I contradict myself, i'm posting on an asexual site of all things, but as of late coming out to people has been something I will probably not do as often as the past and if I do, I know them first very, very well. It has no impact on my life, there are many bold face lies I can use to justify things in my life. I don't need to tell people and besides most people my age just never marry or have sex or have kids anyway :p

yeah that's what I have to offer.
(・×・)

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KAGU143
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Re: Working on an Article for a Magazine

Postby KAGU143 » Wed Mar 07, 2018 5:09 pm

I think I know what you mean. Being asexual is so much easier now than it was when I was still in my (theoretical) reproductive years.
I'm still not afraid to use the nose-picking analogy if people get too snoopy, though.

Yep. Sometimes you just gotta.
Nope. 'Don't want or need any help.
If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

Cavalier080854
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Re: Working on an Article for a Magazine

Postby Cavalier080854 » Thu Mar 08, 2018 3:17 pm

No one cares about Aces. This from an old ace of 63. Straights treat us with benign neglect and LGBT with informed indifference. I was thrown off a Pride event in 1982 for being too normal, what ever that is. I have never been welcomed in that community, but I am with its individuals. I'm still a virgin and will remain so and I am happy with that. I have been around the world in the military and hung around many cultures and people, prostitutes, sex positive women, gays, you name it, I have probably met one. None interest me sexually. Only my close friends know I'm Ace, there is no reason why anyone else should know or needs to know. That is my business and no one else.

Cavalier080854
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Re: Working on an Article for a Magazine

Postby Cavalier080854 » Thu Mar 08, 2018 4:16 pm

The only people who care to make Asexuals public are under 25. The rest of the Aces over 25 don't care, it never crosses our minds from 1 day to another for years at a time. Only resurfacing when interacting with new close friends.

Ciri
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Re: Working on an Article for a Magazine

Postby Ciri » Fri Mar 09, 2018 1:02 pm

I talk about it when sex, sexuality, relationships come up in conversation. The people who need to know, know and that's all that matters.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

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KAGU143
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Re: Working on an Article for a Magazine

Postby KAGU143 » Fri Mar 09, 2018 7:47 pm

It is easier in a lot of ways to socialize with other asexuals because you don't have to worry about accidentally sending the wrong signals, but other than serving as ways for asexuals to meet each other, the various asexual websites don't seem to be accomplishing very much.

I agree that a substantial percentage of younger people who think they are asexual are NOT, but I don't think it's my place to tell them one way or another. They will figure it out in time.
If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.