List the Worst Things You've Done

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Ciri
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List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby Ciri » Wed Feb 26, 2014 7:37 pm

I was going through old school books from 2000-2001 (Year 5) and it looks like I started my funky, unconventional troublemaker ways early. In the back of my maths book, I found a section called "Plans for World Domination"...I'm not even joking. The plots were actually fairly detailed and it's got me thinking that maybe this was why I got sent for sessions with the school counsellor. Personally, I'm surprised I could spell "Domination". Every morning, at the beginning of school, we had to write a paragraph on what we had done the night before. My teacher got annoyed with me saying "I did my homework. Then I went to bed." Which was true, undiagnosed dyslexia meant it took me 4 hours to do 20 minutes of homework a night and the school thought my parents and I were lying about that. In the end, I started writing a paragraph a day of a horror story with myself as the main character. The next year, this policy was scrapped. >.<

In college, my friend was part of a robotics team where they made a robot and put it in a competition. I asked to see the robot, it was pretty cool. Then he remembered he left his bag in the cafe and left me with it. He specifically told me not to touch a certain button because the robot would completely break and they didn't know how to fix it. I pushed the button as soon as he left <.< I wanted to see if he was telling the truth and it turns out he was. To this day, he does not know this was why that robot broke and wasn't fixed ready for the competition. The worst part was when he cried.

My mother pissed me off one day so I took out all the biscuits from a biscuit packet and replaced them with similar looking dog biscuits. Then I watched as she offered them to friends she invited round for coffee, and didn't didn't say anything.

When I was 11, I tried to carry out a plan to hijack my school bus and drive it to Switzerland. I got to "Step One - Remove Seatbelt" before remembering I needed a passport and a can of deoderant wouldn't be a sufficiant weapon to hijack a bus with. And I would have spent hours on said bus with the people I was trying to get away from. I didn't think that plan though.

I've dangle cigerettes on a string from on top a subway. I call it "Chav Baiting".

If I've broken it, I've blamed someone else for it. And got away with it.

That's all I can think of now.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

PiF
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby PiF » Fri Jan 30, 2015 10:16 am

I once told an ex girlfriend that toothpaste that had whitening claims was actually made from mens pram fat.... and read one of the ingredients on the side and said that was it's chemical name. She believed me for about 3 months till she asked her dentists at her next check up.

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Tanwen
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby Tanwen » Fri Jan 30, 2015 2:28 pm

I'm bloody boring :yawn: . Many years ago I'd been out for dinner with a contractor and when driving him back to his hotel I knew I'd had more to drink than I should have (no breathalyser at the time but you still weren't supposed to drive under the influence) when I saw a panda car in my rear view mirror. At the time they could only pull you over for a moving traffic offence (and I'd practiced the 'sobriety tests so I could do them regardless of my condition). The country roads were as country roads usually are and I couldn't keep my eyes on the road and the speedo at the same time. He watched my speed while I watched the road until the police car stopped following me.
You lose nothing when fighting for a cause ... In my mind the losers are those who don't have a cause they care about. - Muhammad Ali

Ciri
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby Ciri » Sat Apr 18, 2015 2:41 am

I'm a disgusting human being.

My coworkers were being assholes on Thursday, so I went to the staff room and licked all their cutlery and let it air dry.

This is knowing I have the beginnings of a virus my family have had.

Some of them already have symptoms.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

PiF
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby PiF » Sat Apr 18, 2015 2:56 am

I remember leaving a job before and the unit was headed by two seniors, one was great, supportive and part of the team, the other was a right git, I remember at a team meet I once described him to his face and in front of others..."you sir, are to people skills what adolf hitler was to judiasm" it may have caused some mirth in the momment but my point was widely acknowledged. He continued to be an arse until my time had come to move on to another team.

Feeling I wanted to show how much he meant to me, on my last day he was out of his office so I walked in, dropped my trousers and opened a top draw in his desk, Just as I was about to squeeze one out in his top drawer, hes equal the other team leader said " what on earth are you doing man?" I replied I thought it was pretty obvious sir....he said you are not doing that in here, I share an office with the twat I do not want that smell as well.

He then went to the other top draw of his colleagues desk, with me still in the trousers down, bum on drawer stance and said " here is his car keys, go and shit in there" I felt it rude to ignore a direct order and duly obliged.

Thankfully knowing this was an event that would happen, I had eaten a rather fiery curry the night before.

I did see the nice team leader about 3 months later overseas and asked how are things? He said the mess in the car took two weeks to stop smelling even after 2 days of scrubbing it clean.

I felt my cv should be updated to include to even dealing with the shitty jobs.

♥ Steph ♥
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby ♥ Steph ♥ » Sat Apr 18, 2015 7:22 am

Worst thing I've ever done...

I stole the cookie from the cookie jar :wah:

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Lia
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby Lia » Sat Apr 18, 2015 7:38 am

I have a sister who is 10.5 months younger than me. We've never gotten along, and I remember this incident vividly.

My father had put us in the car to go somewhere. This was in the late 80's ('87 - '88) where car seats were not mandatory, nor were seatbelts. But it was winter (my sister and I had matching turquoise winter coats on). We'd pulled up to an intersection and paused to make a right turn. When we paused, my sister leaned forward to either lock the door or roll down her window, and the door must not have been shut properly because it opened and she rolled out. Except that my father didn't know and so we continued to drive along (I didn't say anything) until less than a minute later (or maybe a minute or two) my dad began talking to my sister. After she didn't respond (because I continued to say nothing), he called her name. Only then did I pipe up: "Daddy, Julianne's not in the car anymore..."

She was fine! She fell out when we were going at a slow speed and someone behind us saw her and stopped and got her settled on the sidewalk, staying with her until we picked her up.

PiF
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby PiF » Sat Apr 18, 2015 12:14 pm

Sorry still chuckling at that one^^^ reminded me of james bond and the ejector seat

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KAGU143
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby KAGU143 » Sat Apr 18, 2015 12:28 pm

LOL!!
I did a lot of things that caused great anguish to my parents, like repeatedly running away from home and skipping school, but I was never viciously malicious to anybody that I knew personally - not even to people that I disliked.

Now, I did do a few things that I now regret, although I didn't know the people I was vandalizing. I was out very late at night with a friend, and we were up to no good. Back then it was okay to leave your grass clippings in your garbage can overnight and the garbage collectors would take them away in the morning. Seeing an opportunity, we very carefully turned over as many grass-filled cans as we could find and then slid the lids out from under them. Ha ha!! But ... I don't really regret that so much. It was funny and didn't hurt anybody.
Another thing we did was steal and then relocate house numbers. In that neighborhood the corresponding houses on each street would have the same address. Only the street names were different. Some people had placed little house number signs in their front yards. You know, those little metal signs with prongs that stick into the lawn? Anyway, we used to steal those and then relocate them to a different house on a different street, but one that had the same address. (I wish that we could have seen what happened when they were noticed, but we were never able to stick around.)
Another thing a friend and I did when I was even younger (12 or 13?) was steal one of my older classmate's pigeons during the middle of the night, take them back to where we were staying (it was a so-called slumber party - HA!) and then very carefully, using colored chalk, stain them all sorts of different colors. As soon as the sun came up we released them and they flew right back to their home - long before their owner came out to feed them. He was the class bully, and I never regretted doing it. The birds were unharmed. Of course he wasn't harmed either, but at least we had the satisfaction of knowing that we had done something to him. Sort of.

At around that same time, for April Fools, I got up early and taped the lever of the dish sprayer attachment on our sink into the "on" position and aimed it toward where the next person to use the sink would be standing. That would have been a great prank if I hadn't promptly forgotten that I did it!
I was the next one to use the sink ..... (and yes - it worked just like I had envisioned it working!)

I could go on and on .... but my pranks were mischievous for the most part.

Nowadays I don't bother with pranks since I basically only have two strategies for dealing with troublesome beings, human or otherwise:
1) Be as benevolent and evenhanded as possible, or
2) *S. S. S.









*Shoot. Shovel. Shutup.
If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

Venny70
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby Venny70 » Mon May 18, 2015 2:33 am

I was a fun loving guy in my college. My friends and I used to plan various pranks and some of them were similar to those which have been listed on ranker.com.Just take a look at that list. Now I can’t even imagine me doing all that stuff.

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KAGU143
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby KAGU143 » Mon May 18, 2015 10:22 am

Hm ....

Outlining a passed out drunk with empty bottles might be fun. I'll have to think about it ...
If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

PiF
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby PiF » Tue May 19, 2015 12:09 am

Suspect more of a spammer than a member

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KAGU143
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby KAGU143 » Tue May 19, 2015 6:03 am

That was my first thought, too.
I'm still not 100% convinced that he's legit, but his email address has been in use for a long time, so ... benefit of the doubt?
Besides, I still have the delete button if I need it and I don't need to get committee approval to use it!

Hey, Venny? Come back and introduce yourself if you're for real; that way we can talk TO you instead of ABOUT you. :)
If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

Ciri
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Re: List the Worst Things You've Done

Postby Ciri » Fri May 22, 2015 3:54 pm

I've discovered I generate a lot of static electricity. I mean A LOT. I get zapped by the taps, handles, machines at work to the extend I am visibly scared of answering the door in case I am shocked by the handle. I've discovered I can also shock other people.

Guess who doesn't like their coworkers :p
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.