Ciri's Shitty Blog [Dead]

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Ciri
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Thu Oct 31, 2013 5:12 pm

I literally just finished migrating 5 minutes ago (surprising how tiring that is) due to unreconsilable relationship difficulties with proboards <.< http://www.arocalypse.com I haven't finished tweaking it yet if you notice any glaring issues. The biggest issue you'll see is all the posts under guest ~ proboards holds you hostage and doesn't let you migrate so I literally reposted 300 posts as a guest.

It's for aromantics.

OH. Rather than coming to my graduation, my parents are helping my brother move out! Even though he could move out any other day. Sad thing is I expected them to pick him over me and let him knowingly ruin my day. I even expected to be called a selfish brat for complaining. At least I can look forward to aven fireworks which is 2 days later. And this bottle of vodka.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

Ciri
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Sat Nov 02, 2013 5:05 pm

So I'm moving out. Well sort of. My parents and I are moving to a house up the road. And it contains an annex where I'll live. The only current ways to enter it are for my parents to go through one of the upstairs bedrooms into an ensuite bathroom. There's a slidey door in there, everything (bathroom included) on the other side of that slidey door is mine. There's also a back entrance but my parents are going to put a new door so I have my own front door. They're also going to put a lock on my bathroom door so no one can access it from their house. The photos make it look about half of its actual size, they're pretty dire. I'll take better pictures when I actually move in.

Current entrance and bathroom. Out of sight is a door leading to my parents house.

Image

On the other side of that slidey door is the bedroom and stairs leading down...

Image

Those stairs lead to my lounge and office area...

Image

Out of sight is a door leading to the kitchen...

Image

And also my conservatory...

Image

My parents have a conservatory about 10 feet to the right of mine.

And we're sharing the garden...

Image

The decor isn't mine. All I want in it is a bread maker and a hammock.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

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KAGU143
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby KAGU143 » Sun Nov 03, 2013 9:19 am

That looks like a pretty sweet place to hang your hammock! And the rest of your belongings, too.
I don't think I would have objected to living around my parents if I'd had my own separate entrance to my room, and your situation looks even better than that.
It sounds like it's almost a duplex apartment. An awesome find. I'll bet it wasn't vacant for very long.
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Ciri
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Sun Nov 03, 2013 9:31 am

Well the owners of the entire property built the apartment as an extension for a relative who was supposed to move in with them. Stuff happened and the relative died in an accident before ever moving in, so that apartment has been there since 2006 and I'll be the first person to occupy it. They have clearly kept everything in working order too. Nobody else has lived there since the main building has 3 bedrooms and the only permanent occupants were an older couple who kept the other two bedrooms for their older sons.

I need a fluffy rug for the lounge. The carpet scares me a little.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

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KAGU143
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby KAGU143 » Sun Nov 03, 2013 9:37 am

Wow.
It sounds like you have found the housing deal of a lifetime, then. Enjoy it, and take lots of pictures!
I'm still kicking myself for never taking pictures of all of the interesting places I lived in my earlier years. It just never occurred to me, and now I wish I had something concrete to help me remember the smaller details that have slipped away.
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Wed Nov 13, 2013 12:28 pm

Nancy. I got an email notification from you and thought you banned me. Heh.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby flergalwit » Wed Nov 13, 2013 2:33 pm

*bans Cy too for good measure*

Ciri
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Wed Nov 13, 2013 2:42 pm

I ALREADY CANCELLED YOUR FACE IN THAT OTHER THREAD.
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby PiF » Thu Nov 14, 2013 6:32 am

I think Nancy was trying to sell you a kitchen

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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Thu Nov 14, 2013 2:23 pm

I'm going to get everyone on aven and apos to send Pif peppermint teabags. No box, just the teabags. Then when he returns from travelling, he'll be all "wtf why is there 5 feet of teabags covering my house?" And I'll set up a tv camera to capture the reaction forevvveeeeeer.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

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KAGU143
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby KAGU143 » Thu Nov 14, 2013 6:55 pm

I think we will need a mailing address.

:D
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby PiF » Fri Nov 15, 2013 2:39 am

I bet you thought I would drink pints of stella and were surprised when I asked for a peppermint tea

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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Tanwen » Fri Nov 15, 2013 3:18 pm

I have some nettle and peppermint...can I send one of them. He can be a bit prickly so the nettles would be apt :) .

Your new place looks great - have you settled in yet? Did you get a rug for the lounge? Can we have some more pictures?
You lose nothing when fighting for a cause ... In my mind the losers are those who don't have a cause they care about. - Muhammad Ali

Ciri
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Fri Nov 15, 2013 5:54 pm

I haven't moved in yet :o We move in at the end of the month. My dad wasn't originally going to go for it but had to because he knows I've falling in love with my part. He had a phone call 2 minutes before we were due to go into the hall for my graduation ceremony saying if we don't have everything sorted by the end of November, we lose it. I grabbed the phone and gave the solicitor some verbal abuse about awesome timing and trying to ruin my big day...I'm surprised I wasn't arrested, let alone am still allowed to buy it <_<

So I'll be moved in by the end of the month, hopefully >.<

The owner said she is leaving me the majority of what they have since I literally have nothing household wise (she took pity on me). One of those things may be the nice fluffy red rug they have in the main building. I know I'm being left the basics ~ washing machine, dryer, fridge freezer, oven, microwave, sofa and bed. I don't want to buy anything until I find out what she's leaving.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

Ciri
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Fri Nov 15, 2013 6:19 pm

On another note, I am becoming increasingly aware of a power struggle between myself and my mother that I didn't know existed nor do I particularly care for.

Today she told me I would never qualify as a nurse due to my AS. I told her I would do everything in my power to not only graduate top of my class but to also become her boss. She is a Health Care Assistant at the local hospital which is basically a few grades lower than a nurse.

She absolutely cannot stand when I'm right about something and she's wrong, pulling the "I'm your mother card". She called me stupid because she didn't understand something I was telling her about. She takes great delight in telling me I could never do her job (I told her I didn't particularly want to anyway). I'm not allowed opinions with her and she will go out of her way to humiliate me in front of her friends for things I have difficulty doing (ie opening cans ect).

I stopped telling her about my therapy appointments and what psych illnesses I was learning about at Uni because she would always tell me that she has that or that her problems are worse than mine. She once insisted that she had undiagnosed Post Natal Psychosis after giving birth to me and my brother which I outright told her was utter bull. So far, she's "had" PTSD, OCD (honestly, I wouldn't contest that one), every personality disorder, every post natal disorder, 5 different types of Depression, 2 minor anxiety disorders and everything myself and my brother were diagnosed with. I told her the only thing she has is "Medical Students Disease" (hypochrondria med students can develop during their studies where they're convinced they have an illness). The latest is that she needs to buy a UV light because she "has" Seasonal Affective Disorder (she doesn't realise she becomes run down and sick every winter because she takes on twice as many work shifts as she should).

I find this worse than my father living his life through me. She's outright trying to make sure I'm not successful or invalidating it when I am. I really couldn't care less what she thinks but she's definitely beginning to grate on me. I need to move into that new flat fast.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

Ciri
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Sat Nov 16, 2013 6:42 pm

If anyone knows where I can buy a genuine macbook pro charger for less than the apple store price, let me know.

I am no longer allowed to ebay on the grounds that I accidentally bought a knocked off version which has previously electrocuted and killed someone. Yay.

I'm getting the feeling it wouldn't be wise to try it in my mac and to try and get hold of the proper version in a manner I cam afford.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

Ciri
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Mon Nov 25, 2013 10:41 am

Last night I got drunk and ripped up all my family photos. Can't remember what else I did, my room was trashed - smashed tv and radio. Logic dictates I probably did that too.

Yesterday was my cousins christening (my fathers side of the family), my parents wasn't but I wasn't because apparently my aunt (married to my fathers brother) couldn't afford it. That was fair enough, I didn't question it. Then I found out my aunts entire family went, my grandparents went, my nans sister went, some obsure relatives from far away went and for some reason my mothers sister was invited. Bullshit on the couldn't afford it thing, they knew we would pay for me if that was the issue. There was no reason not to invite me. I've done nothing to offend them but this was completely disrespectful.

I have a better relationship with my grandfather than anybody else, including my parents. I found out he said nothing about this and expected me to sit in the car while my parents went to a 4 hour party. Its childish but I thought my cousin was going to steal my grandfathers affection from me (I'm the only girl in the family and the obvious favourite). I feel now that this has actually happened.

Yay. My friends don't want to know me and neither do my family. My puppy is the only thing I'm living for, really.
--
My biggest "trigger" (urgh that word) I being ignored, I guess. That's why phone/text/email replies are so important to me. The reason I got aven banned in the first place (something about not receiving a reply so taking it into my own hands). My parents forgot my birthday last year - who forgets their own daughters birthday even if it is christmas day. And now, hey! Let's completely ignore a close family member when sorting out a party for close family in favour of 60 friends. I don't hold out any hope for my birthday this year.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby PiF » Wed Nov 27, 2013 5:14 am

pah, families are funny fukkas

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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby PiF » Sun Dec 01, 2013 11:04 am

Cyri you have mail

Ciri
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Sun Dec 01, 2013 10:21 pm

:o I like mail.
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Wed Dec 04, 2013 4:44 pm

Ever heard a dog scream?

It's heartwrenching, one of the most horrific noises you can hear. I had the misfortune of hearing it twice today and I'm shaken up over it.

Bailey (my 9 month old German Shepherd pup) was outside when my next door neighbour threw a stone at him. That was the first time. We don't know much about his past, but he's a rescue dog we've had since he was 10 weeks old. We know he was a bait dog in Ireland, he was found starving with his claws gone, teeth filed and nose taped up with rotten meat around his collar to attract fighter dogs. Cutting the rest of the story short, he was nearly put to sleep twice and saw the rest of his litter get shot and torn apart in a dog ring.

Since I've had him, he's been oretty well behaved but he's terrified of plastic bags, boxes and falling objects. Then today, when he was minding his own business (and having a good dump) my idiot immature adult neighbour threw a stone and it hit him. I have never seen him react in that much terror before. Then when my dad threw a ball down the side of the house where he had been (we didn't know what my neighbours had done at that point), he screamed again and ran inside. We comforted him for a bit and I went outside to do my own investigation (Fuzzlebutt and Pif know how I seem to "teleport" from one place to another unheard, I did it twice at the meet) and eavesdropped on my neighbours laughing about how they threw the stone at him. Now he's scared of the garden, I've worked hard to stop him being scared of things like this and those wankers have gone and ruined it for a cheap laugh. Now I'm angry.

Throw stones at my dog, I throw multiple bricks at your face.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

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KAGU143
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby KAGU143 » Thu Dec 05, 2013 8:27 am

Yes, it's time for a face to face confrontation with the neighbor.
No, it's not time to be particularly nice about it. Tell them exactly what you saw and what you heard.

Next time (if there is a next time), call the police. Call animal welfare. Call whoever you have to.
The point is that you want someone in authority to have a serious talk with them.

And if there's a third time .... get evil.
If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

Ciri
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Thu Dec 05, 2013 4:36 pm

I confronted them, they denied everything. I wonder how their car got keyed right along the side earlier?

Oooh perfect opportunity to stick an up to date photo of him on here:
Image

On a more intriguing note, I have figured out the thought process behind aven permabanned people:

"Ciri might have done this, we dont know who to or when and we can't prove it if she actually did it. She joked about having socks and has been asking people to breach backroom stuff to her but the only three people with backroom access she speaks to have all said she has never asked them. Lets permaban her! Oh, don't put the quotes where this has happened even though we are blatantly banning here based on offsite content which we say we don't do. And wait a darn second! You know how we once said the breacher would actually be the person who gets banned rather than the asker? Yeah, lets suddenly change that in this particular case. Because we have wanted Ciri gone for ages and it's totally better to take her word for things when it suits us. Well f*ck you too."

Hafuckingha.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby PiF » Fri Dec 06, 2013 7:16 am

Having seen some of the details Ciri I would say they are acting more on conjecture, hearsay and what if's rather than what has happpened...a very dangerous way to administer a punishment and despite quoting a welcoming forum they are more and more becoming...we welcome those we want

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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Fri Dec 06, 2013 8:22 am

I don't want to go back now anyway, not after this. I'll might appeal just to clear my name because I have honestly not done this stuff.

It gets worse.

Ages ago in this same thread, I wrote about how I felt admods were suffocating me on AVEN and how being banned was a relief. Now they have outright told me that my every move is being watched offsite too, that includes: here, Arocalypse (my own fricking forum), avalanche, Tumblr, skype, probably even AVEN meets. That's even worse. I feel the only way to escape this is to leave all of those places which is a shame because frankly I've already lost all my other friends. Even then I wont be able to escape completely because Arocalypse is my other baby, I'm not abandoning a forum I'm the owner of.

All I want is to be left alone. It's been outright stated in more benevolent terms that they are stalking me.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby PiF » Fri Dec 06, 2013 3:16 pm

Sleep on things I find is best, if it's your forum then you decide the rules and who can stay if you get my drift

To cheer you up tomorrow I will tell you a story about a current aven admin, not mod who with a candidate rigged the questions of an aven election to make it look like they were giving that candidate a rough time because they were in avalanche but the admin and candidate had formulated the questions between them.

For now though i'm off to my sleeps
Last edited by PiF on Sat Dec 07, 2013 1:32 am, edited 1 time in total.

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KAGU143
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby KAGU143 » Fri Dec 06, 2013 7:17 pm

I find that it has helped me a lot to teach myself to completely disregard those who make themselves my enemies. I stop caring about them and their opinions and that allows me to stop thinking about them at all. I won't waste any mental energy by staying angry at them. There is no need to avoid them because they simply don't matter to me on any level. It is a great feeling of personal power to be able to genuinely dismiss someone as utterly insignificant.

Now, I will be the first to admit that it's a lot easier to type than it is to do, that it took me several years to master the skill, and that I can't always do it immediately after someone first pisses me off, but even if it doesn't always work perfectly it has been SOOO worth the effort. .

Nobody gets free space in my head unless I consciously decide to allow it
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Sat Dec 07, 2013 3:41 pm

Its not even those I don't care about (difficult because I instinctively care about everyone which makes that email even sadder - it makes me out to be a bad person). More the fact I don't know who I can talk to anymore. I'm very aware that every conversation is probably being fed back to them. Which sucks because aven was the single support system I had - I don't trust easily. That's ruined now. Oh well, I never needed anybody anyway, its not like I've lost much.

Ah Christmas. I hate Christmas too. My parents spend so much time making sure my brother has a good one that they completely forget my birthday. To be fair last year my mother said to me on the 26th "Oh, it was your birthday yesterday wasn't it. I forgot." some acknowledgement at least. She wonders why I feel invisible.

I'm feeling teen angsty today.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.

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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby PiF » Sun Dec 08, 2013 5:25 am

no problem in feeling angst when you are a teenager..when else are you meant to have teenage angst?

Certianly when your life becomes mostly on the internet people can seem fickle and most will not be true friends but internet aquaitenances

True friends wether internet or real life are very few and far between so don't beat yourself up about that. Perhaps something away from the screen might help establish a bigger pool to add to those internet ones too

ooo I've messaged you about the election rigging admin through pm lol

Ciri
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Re: Ciri's Shitty Blog

Postby Ciri » Sun Dec 08, 2013 12:37 pm

Hahaha and they think I rigged an election? XDD Niiiice.

I can't really go out anywhere because I'm exoected to look after the dog. I manage to escape to meets because they're usually on a Sunday when my parents are off work. But I end up being overtired and being a miserable twonk by the afternoon.

Hey, remember how I said my family are cutting me off? Here's a nice gem.

My cousin publically messaged me on facebook the other day asking "Do you remember everyone dancing to [a certain song] at our annual family Christmas parties?"

I replied "No? I didn't even know we had annual family Christmas parties."

And he hasn't replied yet xD What a twat.
You're all dead and I'm your eternal punishment.